Once upon a time, Ford went a bit mad. It saw its seven-seater S-Max MPV (you know, those things families bought before the crossover market went nuclear) and thought it deserved to be given the 2.5-litre turbocharged inline-five from the Focus ST.
Over 10 years on, we’re still not sure why it happened, but we still appreciate the fantastic absurdity of the performance Ford Smacks. Sure, it was far from a sales success, but we can now reap the benefits on the used market.
The 217bhp on tap allows for a respectable 0-60mph time of 7.4 seconds, and it doesn’t take much to extract more poke from the burbly five-pot under the hood. A simple, relatively conservative remap will up that figure 260bhp, and there’s the potential to push well over 300bhp into Focus RS territory if the ECU jiggery pokery is combined with supporting mods like a freer flowing exhaust and an intercooler upgrade.
A seven-seater MPV - kept stock on the outside - with around 340bhp? There’s a perverse pleasure to be had in owning such a thing, we think.
If you do want one, you won’t have a lot of choice. Ford - unsurprisingly - didn’t shift many of these, and as such we’ve only been able to find seven for sale in the whole country. This one is up for £3690, although the mileage is fairly high at 106,000.